My mission

      We all need a mission in life. It's very important that we spend some time thinking about our it.It's who we are. The beautiful thing is, you get to make it.  All you have to do is list the things that are important to you and live your life to meet the standards of your mission.We can't really be fulfilled by anything outside of it. It's what people will remember you by. My mission is ever changing. It's supposed to be. As we grow, our lives change and with that our roles in life change. We get new jobs. we get married, we have kids(hopefully in that order) and we change because of them. There are however, some core values that should never change. I found the biggest part of mine in a song a couple of years ago. Most people have probably never heard it, but it's called "Garden" by Needtobreathe. The chorus says" Let the songs I sing, bring joy to you. Let the words I say profess my love. Let the notes I choose, be your favorite tune and Father, let my heart be after you." I can't think of a better set of standards to live by. No matter where I go, I can be a joy to others. If you focus your life around being a blessing to others, you will be blessed more than you will ever know. It doesn't have to be big stuff. Other people will appreciate the smallest gestures. Just a smile sometimes does the trick.I also know that if I have my heart in the right place, I can do great things. We should all have our hearts set on what God wants. Someday, when I get the courage, I'm going to have that chorus tattooed on my body someplace.
      I also have roles as a husband and father. I have a picture in my head of what I want my family to be. I want us to be very close. I want my kids to be able to confide in me when they have problems. I want my kids to be able to deal with failure. So much of what is wrong with our society could be fixed by spending time with our family. Sitting down and eating dinner together goes a long way. Playing with your kids or just being there with them lets them know they are loved. That's what we all want anyway, is to be loved. You can tell someone you love them all day but, love is about spending time with the important people in life. If I told my daughter I loved her every day, but never spent time with her, would she believe me? I doubt it or she would have a skewed definition of the word love. All relationships take hard work to make them work. I  know I write a lot about my responsibilities as a family man, but that is because it is part of my mission. I know I can't have the family I see in my head if I don't lead by example and show them how to do these things.
      There are a lot of other things included in my mission statement. Everything I write about is part of it. I want to make a difference in the world and I know if I focus my life on my mission I can make them happen. You can too. What is your mission? Take some time and write down the important things in your life. Live your life according to your mission. Make a difference.
Listen to this:

   

Esse Quam Videri

      Esse quam videri is fancy language used by lots of clubs and other organizations which means "to be", rather than "to seem(to be)". It really is a good motto. It is something that I use a lot as motivation to do some of the unsavory responsibilities of a husband, dad, teacher, or any of my other titles. Somewhere in the early part of the 20th century, people started thinking that it is a lot easier to look like we're doing something than to actually do said something. It is easier, I guess. Let's call it what it really is: taking the easy way out. We get so caught up in worrying about what people think of us that we do things that make us look better, not actually make us better. I have read some really stupid things in magazines. One said(to women) to wear your hair to work wet and carry your things in a gym bag to make it appear that you have been to the gym. What? Aren't people going to notice when her gym clothes get bigger because she's not really going? I also read once to put books around your house so people will think that you read. I'm sure talking to this person will be enlightening. We've made our lives more about what people think about us than what we actually live for. Why doesn't girl number one actually go to the gym and people will know that she goes to the gym. Maybe person number two should actually read a book.
       We spend way to much time appearing to be something. Let's be that something. What have you wasted time "appearing" to do? Take some time today to think about this topic. Whatever image you want to project should take care of itself. So instead of spending time trying to mislead people, spend some time actually working on whatever it is you love. It takes hard work to get the things you want. It seems now that we're so afraid to work that we get caught up in working to get out of things. There are certain things you absolutely can not have in life without work. Think about a farm. If a farmer gets lazy, he can't make it seem like his farm is operating at a high level. He can't wait until the harvest to plant his crops. He has to do the work. If he doesn't, he fails. This leads me to another reason people would rather appear, than be. You might fail. Failure is an option we like to take away from kids. If you don't learn to deal with failure, you get good at never trying. What kids should learn is that it is ok to fail. It is part of life. I love to watch my daughter succeed at something after failing to do it a few times. The customary yell "I did it" is one of the best things in the world. What if I did it for her or helped her too much? I'm sure I do that sometimes, but I know she has to learn to deal with struggle.
      Today, think about what YOU want in life. Not what you what people to think you want out of life. Be strong, don't just buy smaller t-shirts. Read a book, don't just throw one on the table. Talk to God, don't just have the bumper sticker. These things are hard to do. If you do them though, people will know you are what you say you are and they will respect you because you don't have to pretend. Esse Quam Videri.

God Bless,

Seth

Where did we go wrong?

      I love to watch my little girl play. She's just a little ball of energy. She can run around for hours and she never seems to get tired. She's got it right. She doesn't get sore, she doesn't complain, she just goes. All day long. If you take some time to watch a kid play(not in a creepy way), you'll notice this is true for most kids. Our bodies weren't designed to sit around. They were made to go. That is why we have powerful muscles and hearts that can beat in a range from 40 to  over 200 beats per minute. Our cave dwelling ancestors probably lived like kids their whole lives. I know they didn't have mortgages and car payments, but they did have to hunt and find food for their families every single day. They also got chased by bears and large jungle cats. I think I'll take my mortgage. When you don't use your body like it is supposed to be used it starts to break down. You don't have to hurt or be sore, it's a choice. It may be a long road but who says the journey has to end.Fitness is preventative maintenance, like changing the oil in your car. Why can't we feel good as long as we're here? I have to live in my body for the rest of my life and I would like to enjoy that from now until I am gone. I love playing with my daughter. I don't want to roll out of bed tomorrow feeling like crap because I ran around the yard with her.  It doesn't have to be that way. You just have to start. Start moving. Walk, then run. Lift some weights. Sign up for a 5k. Just start moving. Your body needs to be used.
      Another thing I really admire about my daughter is that she really doesn't need anything to have a good time. I could literally chase her from our living room down the hallway all night long. True story. She has more toys than Wal-Mart and she would rather treat me like a jungle gym for hours. Once again, she's got it right. It's not about toys. It's about what you do with what you have and who you have. She just wants my attention; to know that she's loved and adored. Isn't that what we all want? Isn't that why we buy all the fancy stuff we have? So people can see it? We could all live without television. We could live without our iPhones and gadgets. I'm not telling you to throw that stuff away, I'm just saying we put too much importance on stuff that isn't truly vital to our lives. Relationships are what really matter. People matter. People aren't going to remember you for what you had, they will remember you for what you did and who you were. Think about people in your life who have passed away. Do you remember the stuff they had? I don't. I remember watching wrestling with my Papaw Ward when I was in middle school. I remember Thanksgiving at my Mamaw Raley's with 60 people in a 1200 square foot house. The memories I have of them are a part of who I am. Spend some real quality time today with the people you love most.
     Start right where you are, wherever that may be. Like Jesus said. I never said it would be easy, I only said it would be worth it.It's always worth it. Maybe I am a bit of an idealist, but if everyone played like a kid and loved like one too, we'd all be better,happier people.  Let's all be better, happier people today.

God Bless,
Seth

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Are you crazy?

      What in the world are you doing? is a question I get a lot. Where most people may take this as an insult, I look at it like a complement. I'll be the first to say it, I am crazy, but isn't that what it takes. I just say most people aren't crazy enough. I think sometimes people mistake crazy for passionate. It just seems hard to me to do to things well without being passionate about them. When I think about the great things that people have done throughout history, passion seems to be the secret ingredient. Anything that is worth doing, is worth doing well. 
      I am a little bit of a fitness maniac. My neighbors all think I'm insane and who can blame them? Who runs up and down the road with a 60lb punching bag over their shoulder or drags a tire up their driveway with weights in it? Well, I do, but I'm crazy, remember? One time, my neighbor across the road came over to check on me because he was afraid I was going to have a heart attack. I love it though. It's who I am. I love to sweat and be out of breath. It means a lot to me. I find it as a spiritual experience sometimes when I don't think I can finish and somehow I do. The pain lets me feel alive. It always goes away and it is always worth it. I think on this verse a lot: Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.
(Romans 5:3-5 ESV)

      I wish I would, but I don't always carry this attitude to my work. Imagine if we all went to work everyday and were as passionate about our job as we are our hobbies. What if we put our WHOLE self in? It's a lot easier to do things when you have a reason. Give yourself a reason. If it would save someone's life for you to lose 20 pounds, you'd probably have no problem stepping on a treadmill. List the top ten things you like about your job and focus on that. The things you don't like probably get in the way of the things you do. Those things are part of the process. You probably HAVE to do them. Instead of hating them or putting them off, do them first and build some character.You can tell a lot about a person by how they treat the mundane parts of their life.

       Most importantly, you have to be intentional with your actions. Don't let things sneak up on you. Plan your day out and control what happens. I know it's not easy, but nothing worth doing is.If it was, we'd all be living the life we wanted. Just try it one time and see if it helps. Self control is a beautiful thing. I fight it all the time; that little voice in my head telling me it's ok to eat bad or skip a workout. I let little things get in the way of what is really important. I have to remind myself all the time to put the first things first. Live your life in control. You may have to get a little crazy.

      What are you crazy about?

If

      I'm not one to read a ton of poetry, but this one hit me like a ton of bricks. I guess bringing a son in the world gives me a different outlook on life.I know that I have a huge responsibility as a father to mold him into a man someday.The poem is called "If" by Rudyard Kipling. I read this in "Fathered by God" by John Elderedge. The first time I read the chapter it's in I kind of skimmed over it because like I said earlier, I don't really care for poetry. Then I reread the chapter and it floored me.Read it here. If you have to, read it a couple times to really feel the weight it carries.
      In the months leading up to the birth of my son, I spent a lot of time thinking about what it really means to be a man.There were a lot of silent rides to school in prayer and contemplation. Manhood is a complex thing. The truth is, being a man is a never ending process. There are different stages of it.What is really sad, is that in our age, being a man is falsely defined by material means to a lot of people. Money, sex, stature and power come to mind. It's sad because once you start chasing those things, it never ends. You just have to keep playing the game trying to impress people. I don't know if there is a clear definition of what a man should be. I just know that there are certain characteristics all the great ones share. They are all in that poem: honesty, integrity,humility, endurance and so on. I often thought about how I would go about teaching these things to my son. What I kept coming back to was that God trusted me to raise a son. Not that I'm any more capable than any other man but, that is just what I kept coming to. Before I came to this realization, I worried that I didn't have what it takes. Now I know that while I'm in no way the man I need to be for my son right now, I can get there.I will get there. I have to, for him, for my daughter and my wife.
      I think about all the great men in my life that helped me become what I am. My dad, my Papaw, some of my teachers and coaches, and some of my fellow teachers are just a few. The lessons I learned from these men are invaluable. I look forward to teaching my son to tie on a hook just the way my Papaw taught me to. My dad taught me lots of things about sports and even today I enjoy just talking to him about life. One of my football coaches took me aside once and told me how I was a leader and it was my job to keep us altogether. I had no idea what exactly that meant back then, but now it may be one of the greatest complements of my life.My wife's father has taught me a ton about tools and working on things around the house. These men weren't there coincidentally. They were all meant to be there. God put them there for me. I wish he would have reminded me to pay more attention sometimes. This journey of manhood is mapped out for us, we just have to soak it in while we travel through it.If it were not for these men in my life I don't think I would have turned out like I have. I'm so thankful for all of them. 
       I know the journey is a long one and it will be on rough terrain sometimes but, the journey is usually my favorite part of any trip. I understand that it's tough and I embrace it. I want to be the one who keeps his head when those about me are losing theirs. I want my son to see me take on responsibility and to relish in it. My son will have struggles too. I want him to understand that struggle is just a part of life and how he handles it will make him who he is.
      I could probably write 20 pages on this poem. I'm sure i'll come back to it later, but for now I know that I still have some lessons to learn from it.Who are some important men in your life? What lessons did they teach you? Be thankful for them and remember all us dads in your prayers.

God bless,
Seth

Learn to Fight

      Life is hard. That doesn't mean it can't be awesome. What it does mean, is that you have to fight for everything in life worth having. Your friends, your family, your career and anything else that is important is not easy to hold on to. Think about it this way, is it really that hard to be out of shape? Is it that hard to lie? Is it hard to sleep late? No, it isn't. It is hard to be in great shape. Sometimes it can be really hard to be honest and getting up early every day can be a challenge.
      You can have all the things you want in life by fighting for it. All the beautiful things on this earth have to be fought for and protected, that's why we have societies who fight to protect the rain forests and national parks. As if being beautiful wasn't enough. Relationships are the same way. Your relationships with your  spouse, your kids,or your friends all require work. If you stop calling or spending time with them the relationship will wither. They are all worth fighting for. There is a direct correlation between the time you spend with those who mean a lot to you and the quality of that relationship.
      I see a lot as a teacher. One of the saddest things I see at school, are kids who have no direction at home. They feel like they aren't worth anything because no one fights for them. I know times are tough and people are struggling with the basic needs of life but, it's not to much to ask to spend an hour a day with your kids. It goes back to what I said earlier, it's a lot easier to sit on the couch and watch tv than it is to get up and invest an hour of your life in your kids. No matter what anyone says, it is always worth it. You will get more out of that time than you would watching tv. This is why we have a generation of kids being raised by the Jersey Shore and Kim Kardashian (it's really depressing that those people have the same right to vote as I do.).
      What happened to the Jews when they left Egypt? They wandered in the desert for forty years, but did they have to? No, they had a choice. They could have fought. The people they were facing were bigger than they were and had big walls around their cities, but they could have at least fought for what they want. Don't wander around and waste your life because you're afraid to fight. Start picking small battles, learn to tell yourself no (more on this later), and win your life back. Save a little money, drink water, eat grilled instead of fired chicken or spend some time with someone important. All these things are worth the fight.
      One of the worst things you can do in the middle of a struggle is to think about how hard it is. Like I said,   life is hard. That's just understood, like you at the beginning of an imperative sentence (I think that's right). Don't judge it, just put your head down and keep fighting. If you believe what you're doing matters, then it does. You just have to understand that it is going to be hard. But if it is hard, then it is definitely worth the fight.

God Bless,

Seth

It's been a while

      So it has been a long time since I last posted anything on here. A really big thing happened since I last blogged. My wife and I had our son this summer. Now we have two beautiful babies. Needless to say,  I may have put some other things in front of this blog and that is alright with me. So far, this year I have accomplished a lot of goals. I have grown in leaps and bounds in my faith which was a major concern of mine. I feel like I am a better dad and husband. I have almost kept pace with my one book a month goal. I wish I could have kept this blog up weekly, but I didn't. I do think now I can commit to writing once a week or maybe more.
     One of my favorite movies is "Man on Fire". I've seen it probably 10 times. If you haven't seen it you should....like now. The reason I love it so much is that the character played by Denzel Washington starts out as a guy with no purpose in life and ends up giving the title of the movie some real justice. I have a picture behind my desk of  Creasy (Denzel) pointing a gun at someone and behind him is an explosion, which he caused with a rocket launcher(awesome right!?). I don't have this picture because of the gun or the explosion, I have it because of the look on his face. You see him and you know nothing is getting in his way. This kind of reminds me of how Jesus set his face like flint and headed to Jerusalem. These two men had that in common, while they used different methods, nothing got in their way. Focused on one objective and nothing else. Imagine if we lived our lives like this. If we never let the petty small stuff get in our way, what could we do? If we never sat in front of the tv or wasted time on the internet. I'm not saying it's all bad, but just imagine of we "set our face like flint" and just got all the things done in life that were truly important. Whatever your dreams may be, if you cut out all the stuff that gets in the way, you will come a lot closer to getting them. Make a list, now. You have one life on this earth and we, especially in America, have really missed the mark on what is important. I saw a quote on twitter the other day that really hit me hard. It goes like this:


People were created to be loved. Things were created to be used. Lives are in shambles because we do the opposite.





Just think about this scenario. The doctor tells you that you have 6 months left on this earth."Hopefully, your next thought is not....I really need to get those sunglasses I've always wanted or I need more stuff. Most of us would want to spend the bulk of our time with the people in our life who mean the most to us. You would probably LIVE a lot differently and some of us would truly live for the first time.We need to shift our focus from things back to people.Go have an adventure with someone you love. Do some things you never thought you would. I've had so many things in this life, but none of them really ever made me happy. When I think of the times I have truly been happy, it always involves my wife, my kids, my parents, my friends, or my students. A couple was visiting Europe and they came upon a rabbi who had nothing. They asked him,"Rabbi where are all your things?" the rabbi asks "Where are yours?" to which they replied, "but we're just passing through." and he said "so am I." True story. We're just passing through this life, make it count.

If there any suggestions for topics to write about please feel free to comment.

Follow me on twitter@ Sward005

Fix Your Eyes Part Duex

Let's try today, to get a picture of what we want in our lives. Get that picture stuck in your head. Every vision or dream starts with a picture. I know that everyone gets these pictures, its just that most of the time, we ignore them. We say it's just a silly dream. Then we wonder why we go to bed unfulfilled and then have a hard time waking up in the morning. It's because we have no picture in your head of what we should be living for. Don't be one of those people who have a huge list of regrets. Today, I want you to do two things: spend at least 15 thinking about the picture in your head of something you want in your life and try to go all day without complaining. Its almost impossible to go all day, but you'll find if you don't complain you have more time to focus on the big picture. You see this a lot of times in church when people start whining about little stupid things wrong in the church like the flowers. This usually means this person has lost sight of the real purpose of going to church.We get to where we can't see the forest for the trees. I promise though if you will focus on the picture in your head and how to get you'll not have time to complain. We have to nourish our dreams and if this means spending a few minutes a day cultivating them then so be it. I challenge you to be great today, by not complaining and getting your picture and focusing on it. Pascal said"I have overcome all my nightmares with my dreams". Start living your life like it is a dream.

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year everybody.

     Now let's get down to business. We have to wake up and realize that this life is special in that we only have one of them. Each time you wake up you exchange a day of your life doing whatever it is you do. I want to start making each of them count.As I said in yesterdays post, you either live in vision or circumstance. Reactive or proactive. Do you live your life reacting to what's happening around you or do you make things happen? I want to make it happen and I want you to make it happen too. 

"The empires of the future are the empires of the mind"

                                                                          -Winston Churchill

    Our first order of business is to live in vision. To live in vision, obviously, our eyes are the first thing that need work. Not just your physical eyes, but the eyes of our heart and soul. I do want to set goals and achieve them, but vision is different. Vision is about how you see yourself. Take a real good look at yourself. Who or what are you? Are you a mom? Dad? Teacher? Whatever it is, it doesn't matter. Grade yourself. Now just think about what you want to be in the new year. I see myself on fire, not literally, but passionate and focused on my vision. You have to see the things you want in your mind before you get  them. I know a lot of people who have to see things to believe them, but you can see and believe at the same time. You just gotta have faith. Back to our eyes. I love football, so i'll use it from time to time to get my point across. One of the big things you hear coaches and players in college and NFL football talk about nowadays is eye discipline. I heard Roman Harper talking about it the other day. Each player on the field has a job. They must focus on it every play. Eye discipline means looking at your specific keys on every play and reading them to make the play. It takes supreme focus to be able to do this because so much happens on every play in football. It is easy to get distracted and look somewhere else. Get caught looking at the wrong thing, you'll miss an opportunity. We have to take this approach with our goals and our vision. If you keep your eyes and your heart focused on the things you want in life, the circumstances around you will not matter. They have to be in the front of your mind at all times. If you, like me, want to be a great dad in 2012, that must be your focus. Every opportunity I have, I wanna take it to be a great dad. Sometimes that might mean just sitting on the couch watching Elmo or washing my hands over and over in my daughters play kitchen. I have to look for opportunities to be a great dad. If I keep that in my mind all the time, I know I can't lose. My daughter means so much to me that I want to give her that. Sometimes being a great dad isn't all fun and games. I know there will come a time when I have to make the decision to teach her right from wrong, but that is part of the deal. I know I also have to keep my eyes open for that opportunity as well. Now don't get me wrong, I'll be the first one to get caught up in a situation and lose sight of whats important.I'm not going to let that stop me though.Sometimes vision can be a curse. We may have to live through painful circumstances to live our vision. In Chin-Ning Chu's book Thick Face, Black Heart,  he says"Often we are so concerned with what makes us feel good that we forget what makes us great.Let's focus on being great, one day at a time.

What is your vision? How clear is that vision? Clarity is another topic for another day,but on a scale of 1-10, how clear is that picture in your head of what you want? I love good quotes so I'll end this:

"Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone, you may still exist, but you have ceased to live"            

                                                                -Mark Twain